yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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