She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
