we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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