She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
