Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Randomize
