yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
