I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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