My nipple is on Facebook.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
