Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
