So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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