Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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