Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
tell me about the fingering
Randomize