It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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