Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
My bed smells like the plague
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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