Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
