i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
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