The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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