I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
