Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
