Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
