puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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