Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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