i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
