So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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