I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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