Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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