My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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