are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
