Sry I called you an 8
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
