She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
