i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
