fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
