If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize