Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I think people are normalizing furries
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
