So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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