dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
