I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
