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• (718): View more from New York

  you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties

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• (315): View more from New York

  You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.

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• (831): View more from California

  My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  Priorities

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?

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