Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
