I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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