): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
