Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Randomize
