I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
