I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
