i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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