Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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