Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
