yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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