we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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