im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
