"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
