R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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