I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
The feeling are messing with the penis
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize